


Just let me stay, I'm happiest in your arms

by mariamegale



Category: Band of Brothers (TV 2001)
Genre: (as in, Boyfriends, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Communication, Cuddling & Snuggling, First Christmas, Fluff, Kissing, Look at them go!, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, past bad experiences, the hurt is very mild)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:40:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28287129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariamegale/pseuds/mariamegale
Summary: “Hey, Gene, how do you usually spend Christmas?”Eugene doesn’t even look up from his book, although he’s moved one finger to keep track of his lines in that way he does when he’s prepared to get distracted by something. “Working, mostly. A lot of people come in with injuries and the hospital is almost always understaffed, so I volunteer. Why?”“Oh,” Babe says, tugging on the edge of the blanket he’s sitting under thoughtfully, although he really tries to pass it off as casual. “Was… Was that your plan for this year, too?”(It's their first Christmas together. Babe's heart aches for the way Eugene doesn't think Christmas joy is a given.)
Relationships: Edward "Babe" Heffron/Eugene Roe
Comments: 6
Kudos: 32





	Just let me stay, I'm happiest in your arms

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Anthrobrat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anthrobrat/gifts).



> This is for my lovely, lovely, lovely Laura, who has been such a rock through this year. I don't know what I did to earn a friend such as you, but I'm beyond thankful that you've come into my life this year. You're a darling and a sweetheart, and I am so grateful to have you as a friend. I wish you the merriest of Christmas and that the vaccine comes fast, so we can meet up one day. Love you, gal <3

There are a lot of things in life that Babe Heffron loves.

He can’t help it; it just comes easily to him. Babe has had some ups and downs in life, and the general effect of that is that he’s ended up in a place where he doesn’t question happiness — why spend life attempting to quell joy, when there’s already not enough of it in the world?

There is no point in that which Babe, at least, can see. So he lets himself love, freely and easily and joyfully. He loves having hot chocolate in the mornings, he loves taking long showers and changing into pyjamas at 6pm, he loves going out in shorts in the summers when she sun shines on his skin and wearing just enough layers to not freeze, but still let the cold nip at his face and cheeks when he gets out of the door.

Babe loves watching the same movies over and over, because they’re pretty, or funny, or because dinosaurs are cool. He knows his taste in TV and music and food are borderline childish, or just straight-up childish at times, but if someone has an opinion on that they can jolly well fuck off with their negative attitudes and go be pretentious and snobby somewhere else.

He also loves people; he loves his friends, he loves his ma, he loves his siblings. He absolutely adores his boyfriend, and makes it a point to tell him often, because why is life worth living if he doesn’t get to tell Eugene Roe that he’s amazing at least three times a day?

Gene, bless his heart, never complains about it either. Babe knows the sentiment isn’t exactly returned — the “lie still and let me kiss our cheek seventeen times in a row” sentiment, not the “I love you” sentiment. Babe knows Eugene loves him, and Gene is good at showing it in his own ways.

Every time Babe comes home to a fresh and tidy apartment, or the smell of cooking, or just to find Eugene on the sofa with a book, wearing one of the ridiculous sweaters Babe has given him, Babe feels loved. He feels loved when Gene lets him curl up next to him, when he listens to whatever Babe is in the mood to ramble on about that day, when he calls Babe’s attention to let him know a platypus fact that he’s looked up after last week’s ramble. 

Eugene does a very good job of letting Babe know he’s loved, even if it’s not as over the top and obvious as what Babe does, and it’s nice. It feels very cozy.

\----

“Hey, Gene, how do you usually spend Christmas?”

Eugene doesn’t even look up from his book, although he’s moved one finger to keep track of his lines in that way he does when he’s prepared to get distracted by something. “Working, mostly. A lot of people come in with injuries and the hospital is almost always understaffed, so I volunteer. Why?”

“Oh,” Babe says, tugging on the edge of the blanket he’s sitting under thoughtfully, although he really tries to pass it off as casual. “Was… Was that your plan for this year, too?”

“I think so,” Gene says, still not looking up at Babe. “At least Christmas Eve and Day, those are usually the big ones people wanna have off. Why?”

“Nothing.” The casual tone in his voice clearly doesn’t stop him from betraying himself, because Eugene’s eyes are on him now.

“Babe, why are you asking? What do you usually do for Christmas?”

Shrugging even more casually, because that’s a thing people do, right? Babe picks at the blanket again and tries to ignore his own red cheeks. “Nah, nothing, I was just wondering what… We were gonna do for Christmas, but if you wanna work, I’ll just do something on my own. You want me to bring you some Christmas dinner on your shift?”

He can almost hear Eugene’s eyes narrowing at him from the other side of the sofa, and Babe knows his poker face has failed. “Edward, stop it. What do you want us to do for Christmas?”

King of knowing his own feelings, a joker when it comes to actually communicating them efficiently to other people. Babe should sigh at himself. He’s lucky he has a boyfriend who will call him out on his bullshit, because as much as Babe can know how he feels about life, he is actually shit at letting other people know how he feels.

“I just thought it’d be nice to do something together,” he says quietly, sniffling for no reason other than to seem unbothered by the conversation. “Since it’s, you know… Our first Christmas together, I just… Figured it could be cool to celebrate it.”

“I see. What do you want a Christmas celebration to be?”

“Jesus, Gene, I don’t know, just Christmas stuff? Why are you acting as if this is some unheard of thing?”

“We never really celebrated it in my family,” Eugene says blankly, and suddenly Babe feels bad. He folds his book up, dog-earing the page he was on, and slides it onto the coffee table slowly. “Of course I grew up with Christmas, but you know, Mama was always working because of the overtime bonus and Pa… Well. Being festive wasn’t really his strong suit, we mostly just sat around and maybe watched some movies until Mama got home and made dinner.”

“Gene—“ Babe tries, but Eugene, as always, cuts him off before they can really get into details on his home life. 

That’s one of the things that actually bothers him about Gene, this thing he does where he sometimes just refuses to open up about some things. What Babe knows about Eugene’s childhood and lie before he came to Philly for school is a sparse collection of things, told in small snippets in between long stretches of nothing, because Eugene is a private person.

Babe laps up every bit of information that he gets, when he gets it, because he knows he’ll rarely get to hear it twice. It’s frustrated him at times, especially seeing as how he himself is so open with everything that happens; if he so much has a bad sandwich at work, Eugene gets to hear about it.

There was a long period of time that Babe was frustrated, almost angry, with Gene for not sharing more information with him. They’re boyfriends, were friends before then, having a dynamic where Babe told all and Gene none felt… Lopsided. Unequal. Unfair.

It had almost led to a huge fight, because Gene didn’t like to be prodded either, until Babe had sat down with Bill and Julian to complain about it over a couple of beers. He’d aired all his grievances, Bill just sipping his beer while Julian listened and eventually cleared his throat.

“Babe, I know you love him, but these aren’t ‘I once killed a man’ type secrets,” he’d said carefully. “You sharing things with him doesn’t entitle you to details about his life. What’s the harm in letting him keep things to himself? Just talk to him and make sure he tells you the things that are important.”

Mildly infuriated, Babe had had to admit that Julian had a point. It bothered him because he sometimes felt like he didn’t know Eugene, but just as much of it was because Babe was just horribly curious, too. And making his boyfriend share details about his life that he didn’t want to, because Babe was curious, was maybe not the right way to go.

He’d curled up around Gene that night, kissed his cheek and apologised. 

“I just… Can you promise me that you’ll tell me the important bits? As they come up?” He’d finished with, and Eugene had rolled them over to tuck his face into Babe’s neck.

“I can, and I always have, Edward. I just don’t see the point in talking about it. I’m not keeping any secrets, I just… I love you, and I don’t always want to tell people every detail of things. If I tell you the important bits, can you let me keep the other ones?”

It hadn’t been Babe’s favourite compromise in the world, but it worked. Anyways, he found that once he stopped obsessing over it so much, the details of Eugene’s life before him seemed to matter less and less.

So, regardless of how much he wants to delve the fuck into this tragic snippet Gene just shared with him, Babe lets himself be interrupted when Gene clearly marks that he doesn’t want to talk about it.

“I don’t know how you’d celebrate Christmas, Babe, so if you want me to know you have to tell me,” he says firmly, sitting up from where he’s been leaned back against the armrest, his feet gently propped up against Babe’s hip. “When you say you want us to spend Christmas together, what do you mean?”

“Well… Firstly that we actually spend it together,” Babe says, pulling his hands out of his blanket cocoon to wrap one of them around Gene’s ankle. “We don’t have to be a Hallmark movie, just… Opening some presents, eating too much, maybe drink some mulled wine and watch a movie together on the sofa?”

“Don’t you wanna be with your parents?” Eugene asks, frowning a little bit. He pulls his legs up to wrap his arms round his knees casually, but it doesn’t feel like a rejection when his ankle pulls out of Babe’s hand. When Babe puts one arm up along the back of the couch, Eugene lets himself awkwardly crawl closer until he can get his legs over Babe’s lap and his head on Babe’s shoulder. “I thought you guys would do Christmas together.”

“It’s not a mutually exclusive thing,” Babe tells him, wrapping his arms around him. Eugene sighs happily, adjusting himself until he feels comfortable against Babe. “We can go to my parents for dinner and still do those things.”

“Oh. Do you think they’d want me to come?”

“You’re family, Gene. Of course you’re welcome.”

“Oh.”

Babe hugs him a little tighter at the carefully surprised tone in his voice. It’s noble, this thing Eugene does where he never assumes that he’s invited to not make things awkward, but sometimes Babe wishes he’d just take a couple more things for granted. Like being welcome for Christmas.

“Besides, if I tell Ma that your parents are on the other side of the country, she’d probably insist if you were a random man I found on the street. You’re always welcome with the Heffrons, Genie. I promise. Would you wanna go there?”

Eugene is quiet for a little bit, and Babe tries to not rush him, because he knows Gene’s just thinking before he replies. He focuses on stroking a hand up and down Gene’s arm instead, kissing the top of his head, thinking about what Christmas would be like if they do go over to his folks.

There’d probably be some culture shock, calm and gentle Eugene standing in the middle of the actual storm that is all the Heffron siblings gathered under one roof. He’d probably end up sneaking away to the kitchen to help Babe’s ma with the food, and just the thought of that is enough to make him smile, their heads bent together in that way they do when they’re quietly gossiping and joking about the rest of the clan.

His sister, pregnant again, would probably be in there with them — God, she’ll be the size of a planet by the time Christmas rolls around, and probably sick of her four brothers screaming at each other over a game of Monopoly. 

Eugene’d be much better company, talking to her about the new year and life as a mom, peeling potatoes by the sink while Bella complains about something tiny that eventually turns around into tired, but happy, laughter. 

Getting to take him home by the end of the night would be Babe’s favourite part, though. 

\----

“I think I would, Babe,” he says, rubbing one of his thumb over the little bump where Babe’s clavicle ends at the bottom of his throat. “If you want to, I think I’d love to spend Christmas with your parents.”

“We don’t have to be there the whole day,” Babe promises, kissing the top of Gene’s head again, his chest happily warm. “Just long enough to get tuckered out on Christmas feelings, yeah? Then I’m taking you home to show you how much I really wanna wish you a merry Christmas.”

It makes Eugene laugh, reaching up to flick Babe’s chin with one finger. “Are you scheduling Christmas sex with me already, Edward?”

“Sex?” He gasps in fake shock, “Eugene Roe, I was talking about a cup of chocolate, at most a kiss under the mistletoe! Get your mind out of the gutter right this instant.”

“Alright,” Eugene replies, kissing Babe’s cheek before he squirms his way up from the sofa. “No sex on Christmas, got it. Now if you excuse me, I need to go out and find you a new Christmas present.”

Eugene makes it to the door, but only because Babe pushes him up against it after scrambling down the hall, insisting that he is very much more than fine with whatever Gene currently has planned, it’s okay, Christmas isn’t holy and Babe would very much like to have some Christmas sex. Right now, actually, if possible—

He knows he’s being laughed at as Gene kisses him back, but it feels like a laughter filled with love more than anything. Almost as if Eugene is as happy to have Babe as Babe is to have Eugene, which is a thought so dizzying, Babe has to go lie down a bit until he feels recuperated.

And of course Eugene, nurse as he is, should follow him there, make sure he’s actually doing okay. The laughter accompanying him all the way to the bedroom makes Babe’s heart swell.

Yeah, he fucking loves his boyfriend, Babe thinks as he presses Eugene down into the mattress and kisses him five times on the mouth. It’s not his fault, though, his boyfriend just happens to be absolutely lovely.

\----

Waking up on Christmas morning is possibly Babe’s favourite moment in the world. He has a lot of other moments that he also loves, but there’s something special about Christmas. It’s not entirely connected to the fact that it’s the one day of the year he knows he’s going to wake up early, but it’s a part of it. 

It’s that excitement, knowing what the day has in store, knowing what he has to expect and how it’s going to turn out; he doesn’t know all that it’ll bring, but there’s something so undeniable comforting about tradition and having everything already planned out ahead of him.

Of course, it’s made about a hundred times better by looking to the side and seeing his boyfriend’s sleeping face next to him. He’s curled up on Babe’s chest, in that way he always does in his sleep, constantly moving closer to leech off of Babe’s body heat. It would almost be funny, how absolutely horrible Eugene is at retaining his own warmth, if it wasn’t so adorable.

He’s even frowning in his sleep, a small wrinkle between his eyebrows that Babe leans down to kiss gently. It makes Eugene stir a little, frown deepening, and that’s not what he wanted at all. But he kisses Gene again, and when he stirs, Babe rolls them over.

“Merry Christmas,” he mumbles before pressing a kiss to his mouth. It almost makes him laugh how Gene tries to kiss him back, but his lips are soft and a little uncoordinated, and Babe doubts he’s even properly woken up. But Eugene still tries to return the affection, and Babe finds himself getting a clumsy couple of kisses before Gene’s eyes peel open.

“M’rry Christmas,” Eugene mutters, squinting up at Babe through tired eyes. “You’re up early.”

“I am,” Babe laughs at him, rubbing the tips of their noses together. “Been up listening for Santa.”

“We don’t have a chimney,” Gene sighs, wrapping his arms around Babe’s neck, humming happily when Babe presses his lips to Eugene’s jaw. “I was gonna get up before you, get your gift ready.”

Babe doesn’t comment on the fact that Santa knows how to get into places without chimneys, come on, Eugene, instead focusing on continuing to kiss his way down Gene’s throat. “Is it a sexy gift?” 

The response is a swat to his shoulder and a laugh, but his boyfriend nonetheless hums out, “it is. But since you’re already up, we can do that tonight. Don’t be impatient, Edward.”

The last bit is tacked on when Babe whines unhappily at him, a much harder swat being given to his shoulder that time. “But Gene,” Babe pouts, nuzzling into the joint of his neck and shoulder, “it’s my Christmas present.”

“It’s not your only one.” Babe’s ears point up at that, because that means there might be a gift to open too, but Eugene continues before he can sprint out and look for it, morning forgotten. “And we can still have Christmas morning sex if you want, I’m very much in the mood.”

And oh, is Babe in the mood too, moving until he’s laying in his favourite spot in the world, between the warm Y of Eugene’s legs, kissing him deeply as Gene wraps his arms around his neck.

It’s a good start to a Christmas, and one that Babe thoroughly enjoys. Later, they’re going to get up and maybe unwrap some things, make breakfast, get everything together for going over to the Heffron’s, but for now it’s just this. Rocking against Eugene, his legs wrapped around Babe’s waist, no hurry and no pressure, just slow and steady, breathing against each others’ mouths and whispering “I love you”s into the quiet morning air. 

Babe fucking loves Christmas morning.

He loves the rest of Christmas too, he’s starkly reminded, over and over again that day. As he’s allowed to have chocolate for breakfast, as he opens his gift and almost crashes Eugene to the floor over the fucking Nintendo Switch and copy of Animal Crossing he got, again when Eugene opens his gift and sees the kinda lumpy scarf Babe’s knitted him. And the very non-lumpy matching hat and mittens he’d begged his ma into making once he realised knitting was not one of his fortes.

“You’re always so cold,” he explains as Gene just runs his hands over the soft wool. “And you’re never happy with store bought things. I made sure it’s pure wool, too, none of that acrylic you hate so much.”

“When did you even have time to do this?” Eugene asks quietly, and Babe kind of shrugs a little bit.

“I hid it in the laundry hamper in the bathroom, because you never do laundry. So I’ve just been… Knitting in secret, I don’t know, a couple of weeks? Since Halloween maybe? Ma did the other stuff in like a week, she’s a magic—“

“Your mom made me these?” Gene’s eyes are a little wobbly when he looks up at him, full of disbelief, and Babe’s heart melts a little bit. He scoots closer, wraps his arm around Eugene’s shoulders and kisses his cheek. “Why?”

“Of— What do you mean why, Genie, because it was for you, and I love you, and she loves you. It’s a little cheating to ask your ma to make it, I know, but I also got you—“

Eugene hugs him back so hard it almost hurts, burrowing into Babe’s neck. He’s almost trembling a little bit, and Babe stops leaning out from the present containing a new watch for Eugene — because he actually wears a wristwatch, the lunatic, and if he’s gonna do that he’s gonna wear one that looks Good — and instead wraps both his arms around his boyfriend.

“Thank you, Babe,” Eugene whispers, rearranging himself to press his forehead to Babe’s neck and breathe in his scent in deep, slow breaths. “I… Thank you. It’s the best Christmas present I’ve ever gotten.”

It makes Babe’s heart ache a little bit, but he chooses to interpret the ache in a positive way; instead of lingering on whatever’s happened on Eugene’s past Christmases and what he has or hasn’t gotten, Babe decides to instead focus on the fact that he managed to do something good now.

He’d kind of suspected it ever since he asked Eugene what was on his wish list, and Gene had acted as if Babe had seriously asked him what he thought Santa himself would bring him. It’s very important to give his boy a good Christmas this year, okay?

A part of that is making sure they have time to relax for a bit before heading out, sitting on the sofa with Eugene in his lap as he boots up his Switch and Gene turns his new watch over to watch in shine in the light with a smile on his face.

“I love you,” Eugene says quietly after a while, interrupting the quiet by looking up at him, his head leaned heavily on Babe’s shoulder. “I love you so much, Babe.”

Pausing his game, Babe looks down at him too, pausing a second before he replies. He feels the warmth in his chest, the weight of Eugene on him, the slight sting from where Gene had scratched his nails down Babe’s back that morning. Their apartment smells like pine from their tiny little tree, and still like the gingerbread cookies Babe made last night, of that mulled wine Eugene likes.

Eugene’s face is soft and open, calm and happy and almost tender as he looks up at Babe, smiling a little bit in the glow of their festive lights. He looks happy. He looks in love. Babe has never felt so lucky in his life.

“I love you too, Genie,” Babe whispers back at him, kissing the spot between his brows where there are no longer any wrinkles. “Love you so much. Merry Christmas, sweetheart.”

“Merry Christmas,” Eugene says with a smile, tilting his jaw up to get a proper kiss. He’s all soft and relaxed, in a way Babe hasn’t seen him be about anything Christmas-related so far. That makes Babe happy. He wants him to be happy, always.

One day he’s going to end up asking this boy to marry him, he realises, and excitement and joy spreads through him like fire when he does. Babe pauses his game to be able to lean Eugene back, pressing him into the sofa and kissing him as hard as he longs to, heart soaring when Gene throws his arms around him and kisses him back.

Yeah, Christmas is probably Babe’s favourite time of the year, after all. It’s hard to beat when your company is this good.

**Author's Note:**

> quick sidenote: My original plan was to also update CMS today, but due to some Life Circumstances I kinda got the creative juices sucked out of me and didn't make it. I just wanna let you all know, since it's been nearly a month now, that I have in no way abandoned it or put it on the back burner, and hopefully everything will clear up and I'll be able to finish it up soon. Thank you so much for your patience, you're such gems. <3
> 
> \------
> 
> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone! I wish you all the best, regardless of who you are or where you are today and tomorrow, because you all deserve the very best. You're a human being and a person. You deserve to be happy, especially at times like these.
> 
> [Come say hi on tumblr](mariamegale.tumblr.com), or over on the [Band of Brothers public discord server](https://discord.gg/JZVc2Jk)! <3


End file.
